You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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