I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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