i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Are we still banned from the library?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
