i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
