I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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