he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize
