I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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