I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
