So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
