Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
