i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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