so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
