I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize