question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
