And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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