We're like a lot better than the average bears
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Randomize
