I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
