Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
