Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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