she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize