theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
