If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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