This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
