a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
