He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
it's great music for shaving your balls
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
