Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
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