wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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