is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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