Tell her she can't have a vagina
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Randomize
