No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize