I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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