just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
