Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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