I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
high people should be assigned attendants
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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