college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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