just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Your cock deserves a montage
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
