Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
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