actually, I'm a sock model
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
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