Im at strip club and am horny
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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