so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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