So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
