i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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