Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
