doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
