I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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