arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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