Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
