Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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