Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize