I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize