oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
